I have a confession to make. Since my namesake, Jo, a self-confessed ‘cougar’ entered the UK Big Brother house, I’ve become something of an addict to the show. Considering I’ve neither had the time or the inclination to watch reality TV before, it’s something I’m putting down to having too much time on my hands.
But, back to ‘Cougar Jo’. She entered to the ‘cougar’ fanfare, and, while she seemed like a nice enough woman (41, attractive, reasonably intelligent – compared to the other housemates, at least), she promised to spice up the house pursuing ‘prey’, showing the younger men of the house the joys of an older woman.
Truth was, she did very little, flirted with no-one and spent more time in tears than being the strong, empowered cougar she professed to be. And departed in a matter of weeks.
Not a good portrayal of a woman who loves younger men. What I found particularly disturbing was her constant referral to ‘prey’ (or the lack of it). Had an older man gone in the house, boasting he was going to sexually target the younger girls there, he would have been vilified as a pervert, a creep, sexist and sleazy. But seemingly, it’s okay for a cougar woman to speak about men like that.
Talk about double standards.
I’m actually glad it backfired and didn’t go well for her. Not because of anything personal, simply because her attitude to dating younger men stinks. Treat a guy like meat, and the chances are he’ll do the same to you. How can you expect a happy, successful relationship when one party sees the other as little more than a piece of meat to devour? Self-confessed cougars love to tell people it’s not only about dating younger, and that taking the cougar moniker is a feminist stance. But being an empowered, strong and fearless woman isn’t anything to do with denigrating men. It’s about striving to see all human beings as equals, and levelling the playing field to a point where gender is not an excuse for bad behaviour.
Sorry Jo, but if that’s what being a cougar is – maybe it’s time to move beyond it?
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